One Moment in Time

Yesterday was a busy Sunday, but it was one that unless I recorded my actions, I would fail to remember years from now. I woke up, worked on my midterm paper, ate brunch, worked on a presentation, went to Evensong, went to dinner, watched the World Cup Final and finished my paper. I procrastinated and complained about the paper, but I eventually did it. Like many of my days here in England, it was a day packed with activities and events, and it was a day that kept me busy, so why is it that it will be so easily forgotten? (Pause for contemplation) Simply put, I was going through the motions. In this entry, instead of looking at the day as a whole, I’d like to reflect on the one moment of the day in which I was not just simply passively acting but was instead fully experiencing the present. It was a moment in which I was suspended in time, unconcerned with capturing the moment for future memories and unconcerned about past and future thoughts.

That one moment came when I was watching the Evensong performance for a second time, or rather, I was not watching the performance, (because my eyes were closed), but instead listening to the awe-inspiring and powerful music. I have always believed that music is a great emotion enhancer, (Erin—I know you’d agree!), and it was during one of the songs during the service that I felt the most emotion I have felt since being here. I was alone in my thoughts, able to truly experience the music and reflect on the things that were most prevalent in my mind. So many thoughts raced through my head, leaving me slightly unsettled but I left the performance feeling calmer. I'll leave the details of my thoughts to my more personal journal entries, but it is safe to say that all of my worries seemed irrelevant as I appreciated the music and was overcome with the beauty of the harmonized voices and the breathtaking architecture of the chapel in which the service was held. My thoughts in combination with the powerful music moved me to tears as I felt a moment of tranquility, leaving the service feeling calmer and happier. It will be this moment in which I was fully taken in by the music of Evensong and in which I was left alone in my racing thoughts that I will remember about that Sunday--not the presentation I helped to create or the paper that I had to write.

In isolating this particular instance, I am forced to reflect on the rest of my experiences in life. I find that sometimes it is hard to separate myself from capturing the memories of the moments through photos or video and actually truly experiencing the moments in my own mind. I get so caught up in recording every detail of the event so that I can remember it later, but what good does that do when I haven’t gotten the full experience? Obviously the scrapbooker in me will always struggle with the concept of experiencing something solely in my own conscious awareness and I will always feel the compulsion to document my life, but then I also realize that the best part of being here and experiencing everything is not that I get to make an awesome scrapbook when I return home, but it is living in the moment and truly enjoying myself while I am here.

July 11